I am writing to you partly to chronicle the journey my boys are starting and partly to put off painting my bathroom. There. I said it. At least I am honest, right?
This morning Summy kissed me. I didn't ask, didn't beg, didn't try to make it into a game. I didn't mention a mouth, love, or anything else. One of our big goals for him was that by the end of therapy, he'd be able to initiate affection on his own. He started giving kisses a few months ago (you can barely stop Jack from kissing) but you really had to catch him in the right mood, when he was "focused in" and when the planets aligned. But today he grabbed my face with his chubby little hands and laid not one but 3 kisses on me. (One with tongue! LOL!) Before David left for work today, he ASKED him for a hug.
Jack's tolerating the brushing protocol better now because I made up a song so he can predict what is happening next. He gets really agitated when I brush his palms and feet so now I sing "tickie tickie tickie" when I do it and he laughs. (albeit squirms around like a madman because his poor brain is probably going bonkers.)
Sometimes it's hard for me to watch the therapy sessions. Part of our participation in this new study/therapy delivery method is a parent education component. We're going to continue this work during our "lull" with the boys. Sometimes I worry (HA! Sometimes?!?!?!?) that they didn't do enough, didn't get enough out of it, didn't comply enough with the OT. Sometimes I want to rock and clap in the corner because I see myself in my kids and wonder if I have sensory issues!
If two sessions and an evaluation/session have led to this much progress, I feel like the sky is the limit from here. I am so scared that some of these things will never go away. I've been scouring the internet looking for information about preemies and sensory processing disorder, reading studies on the white matter in the brains of premature infants, and worrying myself sick. (again, are you surprised?)
I just know that my little guy kissed me this morning and my heart sang. I kissed him back.
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4 comments:
Yay! You gotta love the tongue kisses. Eli is famous for those and it is always a bit shocking. I love their innocence. Glad they are showing you affection especially with all that you are enduring throughout this preemie journey. I am sure you need it as much as they need to learn to give it! :)
I am SO SO happy for this progress and am staying hopeful for all of you that it continues!!! I can't even express how happy and relieved this makes me!!! ((HUGS))
WOW! Affection! That's amazing!
Don't feel too wierd while you're in your corner. Everyone has some version of SPD. We all go in the corner sometimes.
YAY for the kisses! That's progress. I'm sure it's hard not to worry. You're a great mom though, with two great little boys in your life.
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