Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Milestone woes

I feel like the boys babyhood has been thrown upside down in the last week. So far, since school has ended I have:

-moved them to one nap
-taken away their sippies with soft spouts and given hard plastic spout no handle cups
-not given them a bottle anymore b/c they are now only nursing
-been trying to get Jack to walk (he took 4 steps in a row last night!)

I still want to try giving them whole milk to see if they will drink it, and get them to drink milk from a sippy. (They still won't take EBM or anything but water and juice from the sippy.) Also, I am on project walking kids. The daycare won't take them unless they are walking, and so I am completely fixated on their lack of walking.

And I am not ready to stop BFing. I think I am returning my hospital grade pump, but there really isn't a need to have a pump as I can nurse them anytime at home now that I am off for the summer. But I feel paranoid and like I need a pump just in case. I don't know what the "in case" is for, but I worry...so I am thinking about buying a PISA. David and I had a big talk about breastfeeding which led me to cry when he said "they eventually have to grow up." Maybe I am not ready for that? I feel like I will know when it is *right* to stop, and I just don't feel that way yet.

So I spend my days now consumed with the concept that my kids will never walk, and wondering when exactly the right time is to stop breastfeeding them. I am torn...I want them to grow up, but I don't. These milestones seem like big steps towards "growing up."

Lately, the boys seem so much older, more like toddlers than babies. Between Jack feeding Summy yesterday, both of them taking "phone calls" on every available object they can crook in their neck, and how awesome they have been doing the past 2 weeks with eating only solids, I feel so bittersweet.

So the moral of this post? Being home from work for the summer=worrying mom!

6 comments:

Alicia said...

I know exactly how you feel, I read a saying once (on a blog, gee could've been your blog for all I know) that said "Don't count the days, make the days count," which really resonates with me for my son growing up.

It is so fun to see him doing new things but it is just a reminder that he is not a newborn anymore. I am sure it is more so for you because they were probably so tiny when they were born.

Have you thought about buying the Lansinoh/Ameda Purely Yours pump. It is $149 and from what I have heard is just as good as the PISA (I have it, but have not tried the PISA). If you are going to be using primarily at home, then you probably won't need the bag that comes with the PISA.

Rachael Schirano \\ Rachael Schirano Photography said...

sending you hugs...

i am always both a little sad and a lot happy with each new milestone. it drives home how quickly they are growing up, but i get excited to see where they are going!

Harris Boys said...

I know how you feel :) its hard to watch them become more independent. as far as the bfing goes I would say now's a good time to stop, but again that's a personal choice. I would not worry too much about the walking, they will get it, I promise. Just keep doing what your doing. they seem like happy/healthy little boys and you should be very proud of them and yourself!

Anonymous said...

HUGS! I have no baby advice other than only you will know what is right for your children.

Sara said...

It's so hard to stop nursing. When my first was down to one a day (before bed) it was such a special time. Then I had a few nights where we were really busy and didn't really get to nurse and the next time I offered it she didn't really respond. It was so sad, that I didn't know ahead of time that the last time would be the last time, you know? It is hard to reach that point.

Ah, they grow up so fast!

Elyse said...

Ok-so I do not have kiddos yet, but all I can do is offer encouragment! Have you tried putting the breast milk in the sippy cups? Maybe they will switch over better with their milk first.

Also-they will start walking in their time;)

Hang in there!!!
~Elyse~