Wednesday, July 06, 2011

journey

So I was quiet about it. Secondary infertility. We tried on our own for a mere 6 months this time before starting IUI cycles. As you can imagine, we were petrified that we would have twins again. We decided not to trigger with anything more than one follicle. Sounds easy, right? Not so much. By IUI cycle 3, we had 2, and we bit the bullet and tried it.

Needless to say it didn't matter because all of our treatment cycles were a bust. I was devastated. Sometimes I felt like we were just flushing money down a toilet. I was angry too: at my body, at the clinic which I thought let us down...I made a new plan: save more money and try again in the summer. (2011) I figured it was our last shot.

I felt sooo hungry at Easter. My sister made the most delicious dessert and I couldn't stop eating it. I had lost about 25 pounds over the last 9 months by watching what I ate and trying to eat more veggies. But I was surprised by my appetite and I just felt funny.

The next morning I realized AF was late. I tested, and got a faint positive. I was in shock. After all this time, my body was actually working?!? The test itself was so old, (HA! Thanks again infertility!) we didn't know whether to be excited or not...I was worried it was a false positive. I certainly didn't feel like I had when I was pregnant with the boys.

The next day I took a digital. Positive. Still in shock.

Two betas later, not only am I pregnant but my numbers are REALLY high...as in "are you having multiples?" high.

At 6 weeks I started having doubled-over sobbing cramping. I called my OB and went in to the ER. They drew tons of blood, they did an hour long u/s, and saw no fetal pole. At first they told me it was fine...I could have ovulated late (as I thought) and that was why...but then they got the blood work back and told me I *should* have seen more with the betas as high as they were. (30,000) We were devastated.

A week later I went in to the OB and we saw the heartbeat, but everything was measuring a week behind. Again, she cautioned us not to tell anyone, or get too excited, but it was a step in the right direction.

As of today, everything is measuring on track. I've had 4 ultrasounds, including one level 2, and I'll have the next this week. Strangely, it's still not completely sinking in...it seems so surreal.

10 comments:

Linda said...

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! Tons and tons of healthy vibes for an easy 9 months. I will keep you in my thoughts and hope for lots of happy updates along the way!!!!!

Esther and Brian said...

congratulations! i know that this journey can be so hard and long for so many of us...and i am thrilled for you! i bet this baby as cute as the first two!!!!!!

Annie said...

I will keep you in my prayers. Everything is going to be fine. Take care,

Hugs!!!!

Harris Boys said...

chills reading your journey to this point. So over the moon happy for you and your family!

Cheryl Lage said...

So very happy for you! Your recounting was so compelling....wishing you a happy, healthy pregnancy and meeting with the new little sweetie on the way!

Elyse said...

You totally amaze me! I look forward to reading more about this pregnancy. I am so excited for you and your guys!!

Allison said...

You know how much I love you and how happy I am for you! ((HUGS))

Smilen Champ said...

Hi My name is Jenna and i came across your site. Your sons, are cute, and adoreble. Congrats on being a mom again! I bet the boys will be great big brothers. I love little kids. I was born with a rare life threatening disease. www.miraclechamp.webs.com I love it when people sign my geustbook.

Sarah Dee said...

I am so happy and excited for you. Overjoyed really. What an amazing story. I will pray for a continued happy ending.

Danica said...

Extremly happy for you and glad that everything is okay. Congrats!